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Ahh, No! The Hopocalypse!

Don't shake this one.

You know what goes great with something that rhymes with the apocalypse? The James Bond theme song. Ya, that’s right, the world is about to be saved from the hopocalypse by me. I’m the hero here, just let me at that growler.

Hmm, might need a sidekick for this one.

In celebration of turning 9 years old Phillips Brewery has done something very few 9-year-olds do. Made a kick-ass hopped up beer. And in keeping with the theme of life and prosperity they’ve a-mule-d us all with a name referencing the four horsemen.  You know, famine, disease, death and that other one. Every band has one you forget.

Anywho, they’ve introduced a beer worthy of a donkey caricature strapped with a bomb on it. Nope, it’s not a blueprint of the latest Al-Qaeda attack, it’s the label for the 9 donkeys of the hopocalypse. Dammit, forgot caps lock, hold on.

thERE WE GO.

9 DONKEYS OF THE HOPOCOLYPSE is is engineered using Amarillo, Cascade, Centennial, Chinook, Citra, Hallertauer, Millenium, Palisade and Simcoe hops. Yep, nine of them. And for each of those little hoppy notes there’s an alcohol point (meaning 9%) to put you on your ass.

So, that’s a whole lotta hype I just played for not being on their PR team. How does it stack up?

I don’t want it to end. While too hoppy for many I betchya, this is exactly what you expect from Phillips. Full hops flavour with citrus and floral notes it tastes fresh, like your standing in a field gently nibbling hops from the bush. Like a donkey. It’s fairly similar to their IPAs, and unless you’re an expert you wont be able to discern all the seperate hops. It is a type of IPA I guess. I haven’t actually seen an actual style listed by Phillips, but Beer Advocate lists it as an imperial IPA. That seems to jive. It really hits head on but will fade quick enough not to spoil the next sip. However, this is perfect for the dog days of summer, crisp and refreshing. I might suggest it as an alternative to an appy, you’ll need meal to let the buzz die down. Pairing this with food might not be the easiest thing. That’s why I did it with the bond song. Full circle, bam!

The internet lacks a picture of Bond and a donkey. This'll do, right?

Rambling Post: Triple Beer Fury!

Ok, so I’ve been having difficulty figurin’ out how to write 400 words every time I want to blog about a beer. I know I’m apt to ramble on after I’ve had a pint. It’s one of my specialties, mumbling at length. However, Imma stop that practice and try to write more precise and concise reviews of beers and make them more common for your internet consumption and beer education, such as it can be coming from a young man currently swaying side to side like he’s on a ship travelling between Victoria and Vancouver. Actually, thats exactly what I’m doing. If I was tipsy maybe it’d counteract the sway and I’d stand perpendicular to the horizon? A perfect counter-sway?

Anyways, that’s exactly the type of off tangent expedition I’ll try to chop down.

On to the beer! After forcing you to read all that (maybe) I’m going to reward you with 3! beer reviews. Including my first really negative one!

First on the docket though is the Cutthroat Ale from Tree Brewing. Tree Brewing based out of Kelowna is definitely

Beer in it's natural habitat.

a group to watch with a couple awards to them and this one shows why. As hoppy as an IPA, this is a crisp little bugger with enough bite to scare away noobs. There’s a little bit of fruit in there, but it ends with a crisp finish. This is what I would consider a “warm day” beer, good for cooling off with, but it’s a sipper not one to really go at. It’s the kind you would take to a BBQ and share with friends who are into beer, and then watch someone whose interested but not too familiar with real beer taste it and make a face. There’s always a girlfriend or younger guy who does that.

Right, less rambling.

Ok, so Big Rock, you and I need to talk. You’ve got potential. But not with Gopher. This light lager is bitter and acidic. Some have described it as having a hint of vinegar. WTF? I was talking with a girl at one of the local portable beer repositories and she agreed that Big Rock needs to sort some stuff out. It’s got it’s fans, and Alberta isn’t exactly jumping on the micro bandwagon, and it seems that most of BRs beers are aimed at weening people away from the domestics. However, I’m not sure this will work. They seem to pander more towards the domestic norm, and they’ve been around for 20+ years (just sayin). The acidic note is too strong and there isn’t really much else too it. Maybe it was a bad keg, but other reviews tend to agree about it not being great (maybe I would find grass acidic?). It should be noted I had this on draft, I’m not sure if it makes a difference for this one, but hopefully it was some sort of bizzaro detriment (usually draft is noticeably better to canned/bottled craft brews).

Much less boring in person.

Finally, the one I was looking forward to. Dogfish Breweries IPA, the 60 minute version. This means (according to their website) that it has been continuously hopped for 60 minutes. I have to say, this was a really enjoyable beer. Not as hoppy as most of the IPAs I’ve had, or even the aforementioned Cutthroat, it was a slightly sweeter version with more fruit notes culminating in a crisp finish and mildly sweet aftertaste. The west coast seems to be heavy on the hops, so maybe the fact this bottle has travelled from Delaware is the reason for the difference, but it’s an enjoyable change. This is a much more complex beer than most IPAs and I wish I had gotten a couple bottles. Ah well.

Going Foreign: Erdinger Weißbier

It's been photoshopped. By me!

It’s summer time. The skies are blue, the grass is yellow and the patios are full. If you’re looking for a traditional deck companion, you’re often looking at a wheat beer. Sometimes called a white beer (like Rickards White), these use a large amount of wheat instead of barley, big surprise.

Of wheat beer, there are two main varieties. You’ve got your witbiers and the weissbiers. Fairly similar, the witbier is closer to a belgian style while the weissbier is closer to a pale ale, though style similar to belgians. There’s a difference, but it’s not a big one. Often unfiltered, they have a cloudy golden colour which always throws people. You can find many different versions, but I’m going with the most popular here.

While living in Germany I got hooked on hefewiezens. They were popular and really easy to drink. Not super strong, and with a strong citrus flavour. This is partly due to the fact that, for the most part, they’re served with a slice of lemon on the rim of the glass, which I always choose to toss in. Sometimes lime or orange stand in, but the vast majority go with the golden pucker fruit.

Over the last couple years there’s been a ton of these coming out. I link this to a common business plan I see with all the new microbreweries gaining strength. Since wheat beers have often been a rarity, they’re a bit special. Also, they provide a few flavours and styles to play with, so no two breweries are going to be exactly the same. At the same time, these beer makers like to do seasonal brews, especially for winter and summer, the two opposites. So for winter they come out with a bock or strong ale, and for winter they head in to the weissbiers. In other words, I’ve had bottles and pints from Vancouver Island, Granville Island, Spinnakers, etc.

However, there is one current king of the weissbier. I give Erdinger the crown for a good reason, they make and sell the most. While I don’t like to point out commercial success, I will here. But that’s it.

So, the beer that this company lives by? Not bad at all. I did it proper, with a slice of lemon. This gives it strong citrus flavours, since it didn’t sink well this time. It has a bit of spice flavour to it as well, though not too strong, which I appreciate since I’m not a fan of the strong Belgians. It tastes fairly different from a normal ale, which I attribute to the wheat and unfiltered-ness of it. I don’t know why, I just feel like I can taste the cloudiness. Does that make sense?

Oh, and the head. I think I could balance a penny on that. It’s like that really thick sea foam you see sometimes. I don’t normally mention the top, but this time it really did pop up. That might be due to the long haul in the bottle, but it seemed like the consistency is something unique to this ale.

Over all I’d say a bottle here and there would be nice, but I don’t think I could take an evening with this. Over time it’d become too much and I’d yearn for something darker and more beer-like, in either flavour direction, though I do have a few pints of other whites on occasion. However, I would suggest it for people wondering what a proper wheat beer should be going for. It’s not perfect, but it’s not experimental micro stuff or Rickards (bland) White, so share it with a newbie.

Pub reBlog 1: Irish Times

Ok, so I’ve been meaning to bring these over here for awhile. They’re my pub reviews of places mostly in Victoria, but I’ll do some in other places as well. So ya, I’m kinda reusing these as word fodder for this blog, but I know not many people read it, so it’s kinda new, right? And I’ll update and edit them as well (editor’s note: You should hire an editor).

So I have to say I have a history with Irish Times. It was the first pub I ever hit, I’ve spent countless hours there (some memorable, some memory-less), and I’ve memorized the tap selection.

Ok, well, they’ve changed some of the kegs recently, so I can’t say I know what’s up right now, but I used to have it down.

Styled as a stereotypical Irish pub (on the fancy side), it’s over the top in “authentic” paraphernalia, but it’s well done. The taps are polished brass, everything is wood, there’s book shelves, fireplaces, nooks, and a stage. It’s a sort of “dream pub” or something off a movie set, right on the edge of being too much.

On this particular trip we had an upstairs table (yes, there’s an upstairs, it’s two stories of Eire goodness). We overlooked the bar and central clock. The entire thing is a giant decorative structure, probably something turned into a bar. It’s now got mirrors, shelves and other alcohol related gear on it.

The band wasn’t playing yet, but as with every other day of the week there’s someone scheduled to take stage. U2 or some other band related to the emerald isle was on the speakers.

We knew it gets busy later on, so we ordered pints and food promptly. Luckily it was still a slow period, so we all got the suds quickly.

There’s a decent selection of pints, with a mixture of local micros and some big names from over seas. They do provide a couple of the crap beers, though I never knew why until I witnessed a man actually order a Coors Lite.

Who goes to an Irish pub to order American swill?

Anywho, Guinness and all his friends are there, as well as a reps from Driftwood, Phillips, etc. A bonus is that almost every type has it’s own specific glass. The Hoegardens show up in their massive glass buckets, the Guinness in the recognizable wide, curvy glass, etc.

Unfortunately, this is one of those places that really goes with a full crowd, but when it’s undercapcity it’s a little underwhelming.

But, the service was friendly and since they were used to crowds, having only a few to serve kept them nearby. The kilts don’t hurt either (don’t worry girls, ALL staff members wear kilts).

The food was the usual fare and while it was solid, it wasn’t spectacular. They’ve taken some of my favourites off the menu, which disappoints. There also isn’t much in the way of traditional stuff, and what there is is expensive. They do do a good job of combining west coast into the plan though, making traditional Atlantic dishes Pacific.
All in all it was a good time, though I know they can do better.

Since I wrote that I’ve a) become a better writer (I’d like to think so at least) and b) been back. They’re still a solid pub, even winning a local popularity contest. Prices are still high though and while I’d like to go more often, it just can’t be a regular spot. They’ve also created an online presence as part of the Victoria Pub Company (a couple “destination” pubs owned by the same people) with a blog and other stuff. My blog is better though!

Beerdia

Ok, so I made up that word, but it’s to go with the other stuff I look at in the ale industry besides the imbibing of frothy beverages. I’ve written before about breweries doing tours of their home turf, music to drink to, and Twitter feeds from various enthusiasts. I’ve also linked to some different blogs and websites rating beer.

But there’s plenty out there, so I’m going to pull a couple cool graphics out of the web-o-sphere. I don’t have the copyright to either of them, but I’ll link to their original websites (or at least where I got them from) so you can see where they’re from.

First is the history of beer through paralell timelines showing different types of developments over time.

Now, if that was a little too educational for you, here’s a humorous chart for choosing which beer to drink at any given time. You need to know your logos though.

Ok, so wordwise this is my shortest post yet, but that’s only because I just wrote for the burger blog and I only have 400 words in me per day.

Brown Ale Battle: Nut vs. Honey

Ok, I’ve been meaning to do a review for a couple of bottles of beer that have been in the fridge for awhile. And since they’re both of the brown ale genre, I decided to taste them off against each other. The two battling brews worthy of today’s combat were Dead Frog’s Nut Brown Ale and Vancouver Island’s Spyhopper Honey Brown.

So Dead Frog Brewery has one of the best names in beer making. In fact, not only does it have a great name, but a couple great slogans as well, like “There are more hops in a Dead Frog.” Hilarious and slightly off colour! My kind of humour!

However, I have to say that the brilliant jokes don’t turn into brilliant beer in this case. As a brown ale you’d expect it to be a little sweet. And with the word nut in the name it should

have a little nuttiness to it. Well, it has both. The sweet is the stronger of the two, especially as the beer warms up a little. The nut is in there, but more in the background. There’s a little caramel in there as well, but yeah, I’ll be honest, I find this sweetness too strong, especially as it warms up. It has an almost syrupy taste to me, though I find this with most brown ales out of bottles. A sweet and burnt aftertaste as well. I can understand it maybe becoming an acquired taste, but with so much selection out there, I’m not going to put in the effort.

That, I guess, means the Spyhopper wins out. Surprisingly, I actually find this one a little less sweet, even with the honey. Which is even more interesting since I usually find honey adjuncts in bottles to be sweeter than the tapped version. But alas, they’ve done a good job to trim the sweet of the honey down a bunch.

Looks aren't everything. Also, I hope they aren't using saltwater.

However, that also means that it’s not as strong a flavour and doesn’t really lead this beer. It’s more of basic brown ale with tones of honey in it. If you really want a strong honey flavour, almost any other honey beer will do. This would be a good community beer though, if you’re sharing. It’s not going to put anyone off, just not really impress them either.

Funny enough, the Spyhopper is all over the place in people’s opinions. It’s received a bronze medal from the World Beer Championships but at the same time has been lambasted by bloggers. In the end you can only trust one thing: me…erm, ok your own opinion.

Better Bitter

OK, So I’ve been meaning to write this for a while. In fact, I’ve written it before, twice at least. I had a full post all wrapped up and ready to go when WordPress logged me out.

Basterds.

Well, since this is a beer blog I’ll save my social media rants for another day. Instead I’ll throw my attention to Mitchell’s ESB from Spinnakers. A wonderful beer, this is one of those that isn’t a sipper. It’s one that can destroy a stout man in his 20′s if he decides to let it. It’s a doozy of a dozer. A beer so easy to drink does not come easy. It’s one of those interesting ales that you don’t really know why, but find it tasty. Ok, enough use of these imprecise descriptamathingys.

Instead, poems! Limericks to be exact…ish.

This bitter is a better brew,
The opinion of you know who,
I don’t know why,
My pint is dry,
but my salad is a beery stew.

Ok, so that might not be an actual description of this beer, but part of the problem is that I don’t know how to describe or compare this bitter, due to the lack of bitters in the area, especially draughts.

From my online research there seems to be little difference between ESBs and pale ales. In fact, they could be synonymous, but there does seem to be a category for bitters, sort of a sub-category, like stouts or pilsners, but less obvious.

The bitters tend to be on the lighter scale of things, with a more crisp finish and hoppier flavour, similar to an IPA I guess. It sounds like they could be somewhere between lagers and IPAs, but definitely closer to the ales.

The interesting thing for me is that there is no real outstanding flavour in Mitchells. This might be a bad thing, but with only a bit of nutty coming through and some hops at the crisp finish, there is no real clear flavour. I guess some could call this weak, but I just call it one you can drink all night with out it becoming overwhelming, like some stouts or adjunct filled ales. The draught is better than the bottle, but there is no great difference between the two. They both just taste how I imagine a beer should, if it’s just called beer.

Ok, so I said poems, so here’s a second…and third

This beer is made from local hops,
and hard to find in local shops
I know it’s near
not far from here
but I’ve now made some fifty stops

This beer is made not far from here,
It’s flavour’s good though slightly queer,
The reason is
the brewing whiz
dropped the yeast and uses deer!

Ok, so there’s some repetition, but I’m a beer aficionado, not a poet laureate.

Beer on My Keyboard

So I just finished pouring the last of my bottle of Raspberry Wheat from Phillips. I’m going to just go ahead assume it’s an ale, because it is, but they don’t mention it on the bottle. Anyways, a drip just sploshed out of the pint glass and onto my key board. Luckily, nothing was harmed. Had you all worried, didn’t I?

Interesting thing about this beer? It’s got a very red hue to it, with no food die. Err, dye. Which isn’t a big surprise I guess, since raspberries are sometimes suggested as a natural way to colour something if you’re looking for pink.

So, um, ya, this is another fruit filled glass of beer and like the other two I’ve tried (Cannery’s Blackberry Porter, and a peach or an apricot one I’ve temporarily amnisiaed (I made up that word (and I just double, no, triple parenthesied this sentence)) out) it comes off super strong and super sweet straight out. There’s something about the fruit adjuncts that really causes them to blast out of bottles. I don’t notice it from draughts as much, though it’s rare to find a place serving a single-fruit beer. Usually they like to go with something that has a basket of fruit in it’s nose, not a single stalwart flavour.

Anywho, like the others, the stark start slims down a bit, though it is still the predominant flavour at the end of each sip. While this may be a wheat ale, you’re not gonna be adding any citrus to this, at least not the first bottle or two. If you’ve got a few, it might be an interesting experiment though. The fact this is a beer is even a little hidden, as there is no strong malt and no hops touch to it.

So I’d say try it, if you like the strong fruit beers or raspberries. On a patio it’d be a good choice for a sipper but not an automatic choice for me. Not really a “destination” beer, unless, you’re into that strong fruitiness. And if you’re looking for an intersting beer with hints of certain flavours, this ain’t your pot of tea.

Best Beer Album

So, beer and music are such a common partnership it’s hard to really define it, other than SUPER. And while many people enjoy a bottle or draft while at a show, there are a bunch of songs dedicated to drinking itself, in particular beer. Generally the beer ballads are rowdy rockers tinged with Celtic, country, or blues influences.

This was the best I could come up with

I actually own an album called the Best Beer Drinking Album Ever. However, I might have to disagree with some of the producers choices. I think it’s actually part one of a three volume set, but I digress. First off, this is an album of pop/rock songs, not to be confused with other drinking music based out of Ireland. So it’s got kind of a kitschy edge to it. Also, for some reason it has a song called “Go For a Soda” by Kim Mitchell. Not that I have anything against Mitchell, but the song is all about NOT DRINKING!!!

Come on, in all the music produced over the last half century, there should be at least 18 songs that rock out to the subject of beer, or at least of a proper, non-redneck attitude towards drinking. So I decided to make a list. At the same time, I don’t know all the best drinking songs out there, so I’m looking for help.

Here’s a list of songs I’ve come up with so far, some of which are on “The Best Beer Drinking Album Ever” because they’re obvious choices:

Spirit of the West – Home for a Rest

Spirit of the West – The Crawl

Chumbawamba – Tubthumping

Semisonic – Closing Time

Flogging Molly – Drunken Lullabies

Dropkick Murphys – Spicy McHaggis Jig

Dropkick Murphys – Wild Rover

Buck-o-Nine – Irish Drinking Song

Jimmy George -Token Celtic Drinking Song

The Pogues – Sally MacLennane

Shakey – Irish Party

Classified – Maritimes

Connemara Stone Company – Give us a Stout

Real Big Fish – Beer

Da Vincis – Another Irish Drinking Song

Traffic – John Barleycorn

The Cat Empire – Party Started

The Cat Empire – The Wine Song (I know, not beer, but the AWESOMENESS of this song makes up for that)

Bob Marley – Jamming

Gogol Bordello – Dogs Were Barking

Street Dogs  – Drink Tonight (There’s no online media for that one, sorry)

Ugly Casanova – Things I Don’t Remember

Leonard Cohen – Closing Time

As I researched this I came to a couple of realizations. First off, I love my Celtic stuff. Ok, that’s not news to me. However, for drinking songs, they really do work. I find that a simple song structure with singable lyrics works really well, along with a strong beat to tap a foot to.

I know there’s a couple of odd ones like “Jamming,” which is not a drinking song at all, but have you been outside with a chill beer? It’s epic, in the most relaxing way. And “The Wine Song” is about wine, but is the right mood and sentiment, just different ingredients. I hold no ill will towards wine or other alcohols. I just madly prefer beer.

There’s plenty of drinking songs to be depressed to. I’ve even included a couple. And there’s a bunch of songs to fight to, with there’s one or two on in this list as well. The overall theme I’m going for though is a group of songs that are fun to drink to without being goofy. Have I succeeded? Probably not, in many people’s opinions, but at the same time maybe a few of you will go and add a couple of songs to your party playlist for next time.

Post-Script – Yes, I know I skipped over some classic country songs that are quite fitting for this list. I just don’t really like country to be honest, and therefore I can’t really tell the difference between good and bad country, and I’m not just going to put every song up that mentions beer in the lyrics.